blaaaaaaaah

I had a weird incident tonight where I was looking at the same fluids problem for about two hours and didn't really do anything. I think it's the fever messing up my brain. I don't feel very good...

Part of me keeps asking if these kinds of things are what I want to do with my life and I can honestly say I don't know. I don't seem to enjoy them overmuch compared to some other things. But where is the line between what I enjoy and what I must do to survive to be drawn? Ideally I think there wouldn't be a line. Ideally you would move towards a place where those two are the same. If only I were in love with doing something that had a likelihood of being profitable. One of these days I may have to come to grips with the idea of not making much money...it's not that I'm not capable of making money, I'm sure of that. I just don't know if that sort of thing is where I'm going to wind up. God gave me what He gave me for a reason.

God has a plan. I know that. I just wish I knew more about it. That knowledge will come with God's timing...and all I have to do in the end is be patient.